NFL Gear
Shop for Officially Licensed NFL Fan Gear at Shop.CBSSports.com
Sponsors

Welcome to frickenfunnyjokes.com, one the internet's largest jokes databases, all categorized for easy viewing. Comment, rate or share with your friends by email or on your favorite social sharing site. We're glad you stopped by and we hope you enjoy our site!
A parent's night before Christmas
Category Christmas Jokes
Total Hits 252
Rating
Total Comments 0
The Joke
'Twas the night before Christmas when all through the houseI searched for the tools to hand to my spouse.Instructions were studied and we were inspired,In hopes we could manage "Some Assembly Required."The children were quiet (not asleep) in their beds,While Dad and I faced the evening with dread:A kitchen, two bikes, Barbie's town house to boot!And, thanks to Grandpa, a train with a toot!We opened the boxes, my heart skipped a beat....Let no parts be missing or parts incomplete!Too late for last-minute returns or replacement;If we can't get it right, it goes in the basement!When what to my worrying eyes should appear,But 50 sheets of directions, concise, but not clear,With each part numbered and every slot named,So if we failed, only we could be blamed.More rapid than eagles the parts then fell out,All over the carpet they were scattered about."Now bolt it! Now twist it! Attach it right there!Slide on the seats, and staple the stair!Hammer the shelves, and nail to the stand.""Honey," said hubby, "you just glued my hand."And then in a twinkling, I knew for a factThat all the toy dealers had indeed made a pactTo keep parents busy all Christmas Eve nightWith "assembly required" till morning's first light.We spoke not a word, but kept bent at our work,Till our eyes, they went bleary; our fingers all hurt.The coffee went cold and the night, it wore thinBefore we attached the last rod and last pin.Then laying the tools away in the chest,We fell into bed for a well-deserved rest.But I said to my husband just before I passed out,"This will be the best Christmas, without any doubt.Tomorrow we'll cheer, let the holiday ring,And not have to run to the store for a thing!We did it! We did it! The toys are all setFor the perfect, most perfect, Christmas, I bet!"Then off to dreamland and sweet repose I gratefully went,Though I suppose there's something to say for those self-deluded...I'd forgotten that batteries are never included!
Rate this joke
Send this joke to your friends
Your Name :     :
Friends email :
Categories
About Us
Fricken Funny Jokes is a website dedicated to only jokes categorized for easy viewing and sharing jokes with your friends by email or sharing on Facebook, Twitter or any other social sharing site of your choice.If you would like to contact us for any reason, you can reach us at webmaster [at] frickenfunnyjokes.comIf you would like to inquire about advertising space please put "Advertising" in the subject line.

Copyright 2015 - frickenfunnyjokes.com